Book Review: We Said, They Said – 50 Things Parents and Teachers of Students with Autism Want Each Other to Know by Cassie Zupke


As a parent, have you ever had trouble communicating your requests to the staff at your child’s school?

As a teacher, have you ever been challenged by the demands of a parent?

If you are nodding your head ‘yes’ to either of these questions – this paperback is well worth your time.

WeSaidTheySaidArtCoverWe Said, They Said – 50 Things Parents and Teachers of Students with Autism Want Each Other to Know by Cassie Zupke is a very informative book that is written from the perspective of various parents and teachers and the challenges they face in parenting or teaching children with an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). It is a wonderfully balanced compilation of the feelings, frustrations and difficulties confronted by the adults who care for and work with very unique children.

The author, Cassie Zupke, definitely delivers ’50 things  parents and teachers of students with autism want each other to know’ and does a great job in presenting both sets of experiences. Zupke walks a fine line yet honors the viewpoint of  the individuals involved. They all share the same goal but often follow diverse paths in getting there and have to work with policies and rules that are sometimes difficult to understand.

All 269 pages (paperback) are conversational and set up as very user-friendly. A parent can scan through the table of contents and easily choose the topic that concerns them most at any point in time. The voice of many parents speak of blame, feelings of isolation, exhaustion, grief, acceptance, challenging transitions, depression, trust, and fear on their journey towards a future that is yet to unfold for their child.

The perspective of teachers is also shared and their caring mission to be supportive team players while maintaining boundaries is clear. The fact that teachers have no magic wand and need parents to communicate appropriately and support what they do on the home front is well presented.

This book addresses the underlying current of emotions from both parties quite well. The wish of both caretakers and educators to make the world a better and more inviting place for children learning to make their way in a world that is foreign to them is skillfully portrayed. Teachers invite parents to request knowledge and information about policies and procedures before casting blame and parents invite teachers to never make assumptions and make a concerted effort to ‘see’ what their world is really like.

We Said, They Said by Cassie Zupke is a must read for parents and teachers before they begin their respective voyages through the educational system. It provides a realistic voice for the things parents and teachers want to, and should, unload to one another as they begin their relationship as it helps ‘clear the air’ so to speak.

Reading this book will place parents and teachers in a starting block that is not only in a good position but a positive one. If you are in any way responsible for the development of a human being that resides in the world of autism, I encourage you to put this book on your shopping list today.


Because you read this post, you can get this book at a reduced price. Just go to Future Horizons, and use my code PARENTCOACH in the coupon code box when checking out to receive your special discount.

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