Children with Autism and Sensory Related Behavior
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Have you heard the saying, “When you have met one child with Autism, you have met one child with Autism”?
That’s because every child on the Autism spectrum IS different. Each one experiences the world distinctively, even when compared to their own ASD counterparts. Every autistic brain is wired as one of a kind. This determines the owner’s unique sensory experience and will affect his or her behavior. As a result, each child on the Autism spectrum displays sensory related behavior that is almost as individual as his or her fingerprint.
About one in 20 children, on and off the spectrum, are diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) according to the Sensory Processing Disorder Foundation. Individuals who earn the label of SPD find it difficult to accurately filter the sensory information that is coming in – their brain either reads the sensory input as way too much or way too little.
Even though a child with an Autism Spectrum Disorder does not have a sensory impairment severe enough to warrant the SPD label, he or she can still have sensory issues. So even if your child has been evaluated for a Sensory Processing Disorder and you were told your child does not qualify, DO NOT dismiss the possibility of sensory issues triggering your child’s challenging behaviors.
Your child may be particular about her clothing and the way it feels against her skin. She may refuse to wear certain items or she may take her clothing off when it becomes too unbearable, even in public situations. I have had clients whose children gag at the smell or texture of a certain food and refuse to eat it. And there are children who have resisted potty training due to the cold, hard toilet seat they have to sit on.
Sensory sensitivities such as these and more can trigger a wide range of behaviors that are difficult to manage. But, in many cases, simply altering the environment and making it sensory friendly to your child can eliminate behaviors such as these. That’s right, soft clothing without tags, adjusting your cuisine and buying a new toilet seat or potty chair can prevent such behaviors from occurring.
Children with sensory sensitivities can be hyper or hypo sensitive to different types of visual input or certain touches, tastes, textures, smells and noises. In order to help regulate their senses and modify how they experience the world around them children on the Autism spectrum typically need to maintain a balanced sensory diet.
When senses are not regulated they can cause interference, dissonance, discomfort and even pain for your child. So if you want to change some of your child’s behaviors you first need to ask,
“Does my child experience any sensory chaos?”
In order to find the answer, you need to look at more than the five basic senses of taste, touch, smell, hearing and sight. You need to acquaint yourself with the senses that are often overlooked.
- Proprioceptive (how body parts move/where they are in space),
- Vestibular (balance, where head and body is in relation to earth)
- Interoceptive (awareness of internal organs)
I have had more than one client who had a child with very poor interoceptive awareness. This sense operates without conscious thought and cannot be observed. A poor interoceptive sense indicates a feeble connection to stimuli coming from inside the body.
As an example, if your child literally cannot feel sensations from his bowel and/or bladder (whether it is full or empty), potty training will be riddled with difficulty. His body may not be giving him the proper input or signals necessary for effective potty training and you may be reading all of this as stubborn behavior or outright resistance.
Behaviors such as these are typically not willful, planned or premeditated – they are often occurring because of a clash between the sensory input your child receives from her environment and the way the neural pathways in her brain/ nervous system are wired. Fortunately, it is possible to remove some of the obstacles that your child’s nervous system is putting in the way of behaving appropriately.
Creating a sensory friendly environment and a good sensory diet for your child takes time but it has the amazing potential for modulating behaviors. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
- Eliminate/reduce over-whelming sensory input – If your child is over-reacting to sensory input, there are many ways to change the situation. If your child’s sense of hearing is hypersensitive, the first option is to simply avoid overwhelming sensory settings such as parades, amusement parks and the like. When that’s not an option, consider earplugs or noise cancelling headphones.
- Add sensory input where needed – If your child likes to spin in circles indefinitely and crashes into things, breaking them as a result, chances are she’s craving vestibular input. You can provide that in a number of more appropriate ways by encouraging swinging, trampoline jumping or use of a hippity-hop ball.
Seeing beyond the behavior and looking at your environment with your child’s complete sensory profile in mind will help you shift your mindset from “My child is being a problem.” To “My child is having a problem.” This will make it possible for you to create a more sensory friendly living space that can eliminate previously annoying and challenging behaviors.
Unfortunately, altering the environment does not always produce ‘instant’ results – this can take time depending on the situation. If you have a child that screams every time he or she has to put shoes and socks on, finding a pair of shoes and socks that are comfortable could be a relatively easy and quick solution. On the other hand, if you have a child that tantrums when it is time to get ready for bed, that could take longer to figure out. The key to quick success is to first identify what the trigger to the behavior is and then trying to eliminate the trigger by making a shift in your child’s environment.
How are you doing as a parent of a child with ASD?
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How are you feeling about your parenting lately?
Are you feeling confident and positive in your ability to relate to and deal with the behaviors your child with Autism displays?
Parenting a child on the Autism spectrum and managing their unique behaviors is never easy. If you feel as if your efforts have not been moving in the direction you would like or getting the results you want lately then I encourage you to ponder the two concepts I am about to present.
I know you have been surfing the web and reading books for answers. I know you have been trying to implement what the books and articles are telling you to do. But if the tips you are finding just don’t seem to be working as well as you would like them to, then maybe you need to find a way to customize the parenting tips and tricks to your situation and your child.
Autistic behaviors are so unique to your child that there is no one-size-fits-all approach. In order to work best, every piece of advice, tactic, tip, suggestion and strategy you come across must be adjusted to your child’s specific needs and the special circumstances they present. I can say this with certainty because I am always coaching parents do this and I am able to see how it transforms their relationship with their child and their life.
Another reason parents sometimes hit roadblocks is because they are so focused on “what to do” that they forget about the all-important “how to be” with their child. I believe parenting is less about ‘what to do’ and more about ‘how to be’.
What do I mean by how ‘to be’ with your child?
I am talking about how you relate to and connect with your child.
Have you really tried to understand what it is like to live in a neuro-typical world looking through an Autism lens?
Have you spent some time to ‘be’ in your child’s world and feel what it is like to ‘be’ him or her?
Can you identify with how your child experiences the world?
Once you can say yes to all of the above, you will ‘be’ more comfortable in your role as a parent of a child with Autism and better able to relate to your child as a result. You may say that you are already without stress in this role, but there is always room to grow and expand a feeling of authentic comfort. This will lead to you being more in tune with and better able to predict, and even prevent, the challenging behaviors your child with ASD engages in.
Seeing the world through your child’s eyes will help you ‘be’ the best parent for him or her. It will help you minimize doubt, experience positive change and get the results you want. If you desire to tap into this power sooner than later in order to better manage your child’s autistic-like behaviors, please review my program, Happy Parent, Happy Kids – Overcoming Autistic Behavioral Issues. Once you understand more of ‘how to be’ with your child (instead of how you think he or she should ‘be’have), the ‘what to do’ will fall into place easily. Now doesn’t that sound great?
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Please let me know what you think about the two concepts I presented above.
Did You Have This Question Too?
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Wow! I have heard from many parents who are interested in my behavior program for parents of children with an Autism Spectrum Disorder, Happy Parents, Happy Kids – Overcoming Autistic Behavioral Issues. Some parents have been asking questions about it and I was wondering if you had the same questions as well.
Are you looking for support and guidance in managing your child’s behaviors?
As a parent of a child with an Autism Spectrum Disorder I know you are bombarded with and confused by all sorts of information and options about intervention methods and programs that address behavior. You want the best for your child and you need to spend your limited resources wisely in order to make them last.
In addition to the information I already have available on this page about the behavior program, here are some of the questions I get. I trust my answers will inform your decision to help you make the best investment in your child.
Q – Is this program a work at my own schedule and pace, or are there scheduled dates and times?
A – There are no scheduled dates and times that need to be followed. The four modules/lessons – Understanding Behavior; The Impact of Environment; Managing Challenging Behaviors; Creating Behaviors You Want to See – are sent to you one per week in order for you to have the time to process, internalize and implement the strategies presented. This is a good pace to maintain because allowing too much time to pass between modules/lessons risks losing momentum. But knowing that the life of a parent is extremely busy and unpredictable, you can determine the pace that is best for you.
Q – Will there be added costs for any specialized materials?
A – No, there are no added costs that are required for this course, all you need is delivered to you weekly to download. There is an optional invitation to join a private Facebook group if you would like to ask questions as you implement the information you are learning as well as receive ongoing support.
Q – It sounds too good to be true that this will all happen in 6 weeks.
A – This may sound too good to be true but you will begin to see the target behavior you chose shift or minimize within six weeks as long as you begin to use the strategies immediately and follow through consistently on all that is presented.
Q – I’d like to see a few more specifics about the type of behaviors that will be covered. What behaviors can actually be helped?
A – The parenting approach I present in this behavior program will address any and all behaviors – running, rolling on the floor, kicking, screaming at a high pitch, non-compliant, resistant and repetitive behaviors, tantrums/meltdowns etc. This program will teach you the same basic approach – the crucial steps – you need to take in order to alter any challenging behavior.
Q – Will the program address the anger aspect?
A – Yes, anger management and dealing with other emotions is addressed in Module 3 – Managing Challenging Behaviors. There is much you can do as a parent to help your child manage anger and stress and this program introduces the strategies you can use to help your child identify and express his or her feelings in an appropriate manner.
In addition to asking questions, one parent said, “Your description of what you offer is AWESOME and I specifically like that you insist that parents take care of themselves and give them some ideas on how to do that!” This refers to the self-care information that is included as a bonus. When you take better care of yourself, even in very small ways, it can have an extremely positive effect on your child’s behavior.
Learn to manage your child’s Autistic behaviors like you never thought possible!
Just click here for more information.
Even though we can acknowledge and celebrate relationships any day of the year, Valentine’s Day reminds us to do so. Our culture seems to focus mostly on romantic relationships with our significant others on this day but other relationships are celebrated as well. Just go to your local drug store or card shop and you will see Valentine’s Day cards not only for spouses, but children, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends and more.
I like this holiday and the opportunity it gives to remind everyone that ALL relationships are important and need to be recognized. It makes one take notice of their relationships and encourages them to ponder what can be done to enhance their connections and make them better.
Relationships aren’t always easy and can sometimes be full of strife and conflict, such as the parent child relationship. Parenting isn’t easy because children don’t have all the tools they need yet to understand and reciprocate in kind. Children, on or off the Autism spectrum, have to be taught how relationships work. And you are the best candidate to do this.
If your connection to your child on the Autism spectrum is often strained due to the challenging behaviors he or she displays and you want a few tips for learning how to handle difficult situations then you want to consider calling in to this free phone session.
Manage Your Child’s Autism Behaviors Like You Never Thought Possible!
Wednesday, February 20 at 2:00pm ET, 11:00am PT
If you are struggling to manage your child’s challenging behaviors – sometimes, often, or more than you desire – I can’t wait to share my proven system to help you manage your child’s most difficult behaviors. This is a wonderful opportunity to discover some of the secrets you need to easily and calmly deal with your child’s attitudes, habits, rituals, routines and actions and enhance your relationship as a result.
Click here for more information and reserve your free spot.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
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I have always been astonished by the amazing abilities individuals with an Autism Spectrum Disorder have. Sometimes these gifts are hidden and I have to help parents dig for the treasure that lies within. Other times this extraordinary talent is obvious to all, which makes it easy for parents to nurture and cultivate.
Then there is another scenario – one where this skill, this aptitude, is forever present and threatening to interfere with other aspects of daily life. Here is such a situation that was presented to me recently:
“My grandson, 6-1/2, frequently plays ‘computer games’ in his head. He will fixate on one specific game, and will play it in his mind, complete with hand motions and sound effects, for extended periods of time. It is very hard to get him to ‘turn it off’, and since his voice level also increases when playing these games, it can be disturbing to others, especially if it is during school time. At home we prompt him with ‘Good Voice’, which means turning it down, and we also try to get his attention to distract him from playing games in his mind excessively as he completely withdraws into his own little world that way.”
What an amazing visual brain! Yet, what a dilemma!
Maybe you can identify with this exceptional challenge. Have you discovered the unique and astonishing ability your child on the Autism spectrum possesses? Does it occupy more time in the day than you would like?
Once discovered, how do you manage your child’s remarkable gift(s) so that it doesn’t hamper growth and development in other areas, such as social skill development? If your child’s strong passion to use her unique skill over and over again is presenting a challenge to you, keep reading.
The caregiver mentioned here is justified with her concerns and I applaud her for proactively seeking guidance to prevent this behavior from becoming an obsession. To her credit, she is already employing two very effective strategies that I encourage parents to use in situations such as these – prompting and distraction.
It is important to feed any child’s passion but balancing it with everything else that needs to be done and attended to is essential. Here are eight strategies to help you do this.
- Expand your child’s horizons. It is always good to broaden your child’s focus beyond his or her immediate environment and interests because you never know when you will discover the key to unlock the special gift he or she has been blessed with. If your child’s talent is already apparent, exposing him to the greater world can help you channel his amazing skill onto the most appropriate path. In the example above, it may make sense to introduce this child to the process of creating video. With such a visual talent this child could easily have a wonderful future as a software developer for video games. Beginning to explore the video game world and tapping his passion into the practical side of how video games are made could give this child something else to occupy his mind.
- Use distraction. When you notice your child beginning to engage in a repetitive behavior give your child something to do or start a conversation. When we are bored, we all default into behaviors that we are not even conscious of doing. So just in case the trigger is boredom, get your child physically active – engage her in exercise or some other activity she can chose from. Sometimes just asking, “What are you thinking about?” will be enough to distract her and stop the behavior.
- Create opportunities for social interaction. This is a great distraction tool and will help prevent the possibility of your child becoming isolated from peers. Children with ASD struggle enough with social skills and when a child’s focus is too narrow, it becomes even more difficult to meet and make friends. Finding like-minded or other minded peers can be a challenge so take the time to explore social situations, groups, clubs, activities that will not only make your child hone his social skills but may introduce him to other interesting topics as well.
- Pay attention. As the caregiver above points out, her grandson will easily withdraw into his own little world therefore she has to consciously keep her grandson from disappearing into his head too often. Paying attention to the default mode you may tend to fall into when your child is ‘occupied’ and not demanding your attention is crucial. When your child is requiring very little from you it is sometimes tempting to allow the behavior to continue. But, you must be careful not to allow your child to hyper-focus in any one direction. Remain hyper-vigilant and always asking yourself, “In what way is the behavior my child is engaging in right now helping her become the person I hope for her to be?”
- Use realistic prompts. Prompts can be verbal and direct or nonverbal and indirect. Identify in advance, a variety of prompts that will help modify your child’s behavior. Prompts should be taught ahead of time so the child understands what they mean. Direct, verbal prompts, are good to use when first addressing a behavior. Verbal prompts give direction and information that helps shape behavior. Parents should eventually move towards the non-verbal and less direct prompts in order to encourage dynamic thinking. Children with Autism eventually need to become proficient problem solvers on their own. Encouraging your child when developmentally appropriate to have input into prompts will not only increase the likelihood that they will work, it will also help him become more self-directed. Gradually weaning to indirect, nonverbal prompts will hasten this process.
- Be proactive. Seek to understand the function of these behaviors. It is important to remember that most of these are unconscious and they occur involuntarily to some degree, especially in the beginning. However, once a child realizes the rush or relief it brings to her senses and how it helps her cope it then becomes more intentional and easily gets reinforced into a habit. As long as it is deemed appropriate it can become a functional way to comfort and entertain one self but if it is seen as dysfunctional and not channeled in the right way it can easily spiral out of control. Ask what function this behavior is serving and see if you can introduce another activity – a more appropriate substitute – that will provide the same results.
- Focus on your child’s positive behaviors. Concentrating on appropriate behaviors and explaining the function they serve and why they are acceptable can reinforce more of the same. “I like the way your hands are being quiet. It makes it easier for you to pay attention to what is going on around you.” Then the focus can turn to redirecting the inappropriate behaviors and substituting them with more suitable outlets.
- Schedule time for the behavior. No one can stop a behavior cold turkey, especially if it has been meeting a physical, psychological or sensory need and there is nothing much to replace it with. Schedule times and places throughout your child’s day when she knows she will be able to engage in the behavior you are trying to modify. Allocating time for this behavior into your child’s visual schedule will comfort her to know it is not completely banned and will also teach appropriate time and place. Think of it as a gradual weaning process – as you decrease engagement in the negative behavior you slowly increase exposure to a more positive substitute.
Helping your child utilize her passions, interests and talents in a productive way is a constant balancing act yet it does not have to be a struggle. Sometimes consciously paying attention to how these wonderful gifts impact her life is all that is needed to help keep her on track to becoming the amazing person she was meant to be.
How do you channel your child’s amazing skills in a positive direction?
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This book will put a smile on anyone’s face but the title fails to fully describe its true impact. The subtitle – New and Revised Stories That Will Warm and Inspire You – is missing one very important piece. The collection of stories in this eye-opening book will not only “warm and inspire you” but they will ‘educate’ you as well. This delightful crash course about living on the spectrum easily lures you into the world of Autism Spectrum Disorders and informs you about the challenges that living in such a world brings.
Should the reader be someone who has only seen or heard about autism from a distance, this book is a great vehicle for inviting him or her to come one step closer. The author, R. Wayne Gilpin brings the reader to a better understanding of what it is like to live with autism in an entertaining way – you can’t help but chuckle, cry, gasp, and feel empathy as you turn these 190 pages of charming yet personal anecdotes.
If you are a parent of a child with autism that occasionally experiences feelings of isolation, pick up this book because it will bring you great comfort. Reading it confirms that other parents face similar challenges and experiences – ones that can be viewed in a positive and sometimes humorous light, especially in hindsight. In an unexpected way, this book can serve to validate life with autism and balance the difficult times with an uplifting perspective.
Each chapter focuses on a different category encompassing almost every environment and aspect of life that touches a family of a child with ASD. These real-life sketches embrace the unique qualities inherent in individuals with ASD – the sensory issues, the literal and concrete way of thinking – as well as the universal similarity they often aren’t aware of – a candid sense of humor.
The author, Wayne Gilpin, has chosen these tales wisely, representing parents, caretakers, family members, other accomplished authors such as Bobbie Sheahan, Carol Gray and Jennifer McIlwee Myers, and some unknown individuals. The sibling voice of Alex’s sister, Jennifer, is very poignant to listen to as the paper she wrote about her brother for English class is shared. The author himself shares many touching and emotional snippets as well.
This book was complied and written from the perspective of a parent that lived the reality of autism with his son, Alex, who was such a gift and inspiration. As a result, the author has left such a wonderful legacy to his son in the form of this book and the creation of Future Horizons, the world’s largest publisher of resources on autism, Asperger’s syndrome, and sensory processing disorder.
The section that is my personal favorite of this book is chapter 11, “Alex’s E-mails”. I particularly love the email he writes to his Aunt Carole where he explains that he can’t help being “a funny guy” because he has a “disease called Saying Funny Things-tism”. How precious! And how appropriate for a book full of stories about people with “Saying Funny Things-tism.”
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To purchase your own copy of R. Wayne Gilpin’s book, or one or two for someone else, go to his publishing company, Future Horizons. To help make this purchase more affordable, you can receive a 15% discount if you use the code – PARENTCOACH – in the coupon code box when checking out. You can also benefit from 15% off other items you may wish to purchase, including conferences.
****I do need to disclose that I received a complimentary copy from the publisher for an honest review – and truthful and sincere is what this review is. Also I want you to know that the link above has an affiliate number attached to it. So yes, honestly, we both benefit from your purchase. Enjoy!
Motivating Children – On or Off the Autism Spectrum
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Have you ever seen someone pushing themselves, or someone they love, so hard to attain a goal that it comes at the expense of something else? An athlete who runs the marathon yet incurs damage to his knees in the process. A wife who pushes herself to climb the career ladder to success so much that it comes at the cost of her relationship with her partner/spouse. When it comes to pushing ourselves that is one thing, we all have the right to make our own decisions and learn from the consequences, good or bad. But, when it comes to persuading and urging those we love and care about, is there a line in the sand that we should not cross?
As a parent of a child with an Autism Spectrum Disorder you may question just how forceful you need to be in order to help your child overcome challenges and achieve new possibilities. Every parent wants their child to succeed and parents of kids with autism are no different. Finding just the right balance between not enough pressure and too much is often a dilemma for most parents.
All children need to be guided – they depend on their parents and other adults to steer them in order to acquire certain life skills. Whether they are trying to succeed at riding a bike for the first time, making social connections, attempting a math problem or learning to conquer a simple daily self-care skill, children need anything from a constant yet gentle nudge to a more forceful push.
When you want your child to reach a certain goal, how much do you push without causing excessive tension and stress that could have a negative effect?
Finding the best way to motivate your child to approach a challenge is complex. The tricky part is how to encourage her in a way that avoids the possibility of unknowingly discouraging them. And just as Goldilocks did eventually, every parent needs to find a method that is “just right” for each child. That’s right, the same approach will not work for every child. Some children may respond to an approach that is “too soft” and others will occasionally prosper from a nudge that some may consider “too hard”.
The first step is to get into your child’s mind and wear his skin to see what it is like to be him and notice how he experiences the world. This will answer a lot of questions and help you customize your way of relating to him.
Here are seven strategies to keep in mind for discovering and applying just the right amount of pressure.
- Tap into interests – Always try to tie in one of your child’s favorite activities or pastimes into the experience when you are gently nudging him towards a goal. Using what he is passionate about, or at least interested in, will help stimulate his incentive to stretch himself as much as possible. If your goal is to reduce a repetitive behavior, distracting him with another activity or task that he really favors is helpful.
- Take baby steps – Finding a rhythm and intentionally pacing your child are the first things that come to mind when knowing just how much to push or not. Breaking things down into small and attainable steps is always wise. If you want your child with high-functioning Autism to become more social, then gradually expose her to small chunks of time in a social setting. Start with five minutes, and then add one or two minutes more after each success.
- Pay attention to signs of stress or success – Always be on the alert for signals of distress and have a plan B on hand that is ready to put in place. Stress is counterproductive to progress and can easily lure your autistic child into a state of frustration and anxiety that can lead to a negative experience making it unlikely that your child will want to pick up again where she left off. On the other hand, if you see success, celebrate it!
- Make it fun – Who doesn’t like fun? Find a way to keep things light and humorous. Not only will your child enjoy the process more but the contagious nature of laughter will spread throughout your child and help create a positive and powerful energy that is bound to increase his stamina towards his goal.
- Fine-tune your approach as needed - Paying attention to your child’s ability to transition is important here. As soon as you know a major transition is coming up and an adjustment has to be made begin shifting gears as gently as possible considering what you know about your child’s tolerance for change. The skill and finesse at which you make this happen will directly correlate to paving the way to success.
- Build internal motivation. Along with the ability to delay gratification, one of the best indicators for success is self-motivation. Unfortunately, parents sometimes spend too much time trying to get their child to comply with the use of external rewards. To help your child become internally motivated, remember to focus on and praise for effort more than you do on outcome. The sooner a child gets a sense that they have power and control over their own learning by the amount of effort they put into it, the less likely you will have to prod them along.
- Evaluate your own motivation. Whose goal is it? Take some time to honestly assess if the skill you are trying to get your child to reach is something you want as opposed to something that will really benefit her. Sometimes parents want things for their child that they were not able to attain when they were young. This is called living vicariously through your child and although it is not done intentionally in most cases, it can trigger negative consequences.
If you would like more then just a few tips to help you figure out how best to encourage your children without discouraging them, consider scheduling a time for a complimentary 15-minute chat with me via phone or Skype by clicking here.
I recently created a survey asking parents of children with an Autism Spectrum Disorder what their current needs are in regards to their child.
This one question survey asked – What is the one thing I could do or offer you right now that would help you the most?
Of those who responded to the survey, 84% said they needed information, 20.5% shared that support is what they need right now, and 25% of them appealed for some assistance with advocacy.
The topic areas they wanted information, support and advocacy on were:
- managing difficult behaviors – meltdowns and tantrums
- helping build social skills
- dealing with communication challenges/language
- helping my child with transitions
- reducing anxiety
- finding services and determining which are best for my child
- potty training
- developing life skills/independence
- teaching my child to self-advocate
- transitioning to adulthood
- puberty/hygiene
- telling my child he/she is on the Autism spectrum
- sleep/bedtime issues/gaining confidence
- personal support
- where to find standard and alternative treatments
- self-regulation
- school related issues
- keeping my child safe from abuse
- a request for in-depth courses
- and more . . . .
Guess what? I have information and programs available on all of those topics and I also offer intensive support with one-on-one coaching to help any parent address and conquer whatever hurdle they are currently facing.
- If you want information about the above mentioned topics in the form of articles, just ask me because I probably have one on the topic you are looking for or you can search through my blog here http://www.parentcoachingforautism.com/blog.
- If you just received a diagnosis of an Autism Spectrum disorder for your child, I have a FREE special report, 7 Steps for Dealing with Your Child’s Autism Diagnosis – How to Raise a Happy, Healthy Child with ASD, available for you here,
http://parentcoachingforautism.com/products/special-report-2013/
- If you are having trouble with your child’s behavior, or struggling to help your child adjust to school, or in need of potty training assistance or are looking for tips to eliminate the early morning rush, . . . I have developed affordable on-line programs you can access here
http://parentcoachingforautism.com/how-we-help/products/
- If you want personal guidance to help you get what your child needs quickly then you want to consider hiring me as your personal coach, even if for just one session. See my coaching options here http://parentcoachingforautism.com/products/private-coaching/
I want to make sure you know you can find what you need right here with me on Parent Coaching for Autism. I hate to see you floundering about, wasting your money trying this and that, when I can help you focus and guide you to the interventions that will help your child the most. By engaging in personal coaching sessions by phone or Skype, I save you time, energy and effort – a fast track to help your child blossom.
You know best what you can and can’t do by yourself and whether or not you desire personal assistance from me. If you do, I am here for you. If not, I have oodles of free information for you.
Wishing you the very best in your parenting efforts and if it is in the cards that we work together soon, I look forward to it very, very much.
Many children with Autism require specific instruction for how to keep themselves safe from danger and recognize why it is important. This delightful children’s book includes ten very concrete and specific danger/safety rules that literal, concrete thinkers will appreciate. Each rule has a great visual illustration that displays the safe and unsafe way to do things side-by-side so it is easy to compare.
Even though there is so much more to teaching a child on the Autism spectrum about danger and how to remain safe, this book is a wonderful place to start the conversation. A parent can always expand upon any one of these ten danger rules to help their child learn more about safety and begin generalize to situations beyond their immediate environment.
In keeping with the author’s first book, Autism Is . . . ?, this new tale also uses rhyme which makes it easy for a child to commit to memory. For even more enjoyment this narrative also contains a Where’s Waldo type search for ten little fire trucks that will keep any child engaged and motivated.
Similar to a social story, reading this book to a child with Autism will help create the neuron connections necessary to commit these rules to memory if read repeatedly. Another bonus to this book is when the author shares her own story at the end in ‘Notes to Parents and Caregivers’ of how this helped her grandson learn the rules that help maintain his safety.
Safety is such an important issue for children with ASD so don’t wait to talk about it, get a copy of this visually appealing and delightfully interactive book today.
And now, for a few words from the author herself.
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Danger Is…?
Logan runs to a busy street and nearly has an accident! Once safely back inside, his grandma talks about the meaning of danger and teaches him ten important danger rules.
Children with autism often lack a sense of danger, and it can be difficult to teach them safety rules. My grandson was no exception. After a few near accidents, I was desperate to get through to him that running into the street, putting his hand onto a hot stove, and unbuckling his seat belt while driving, could result in serious injury.
Danger is…? struck a chord with him, and after reading the story with him repeatedly, he started referring to it when I was cooking in the kitchen, while out in the car, or when crossing a busy road. To my delight, he stopped without prodding at the curb one day, and quoted Danger Rule # 7.
I also created a Danger Rules key ring for him. Visually and verbally reviewing the Danger Rules on his key ring regularly, and especially before going out, reinforced them even more, and is helping to keep him safe.
I hope this book can contribute to keeping other children with autism safe also.
Available here https://tsw.createspace.com/
Children do not come into this world able to care of themselves. In the beginning they are dependent upon their parents for everything, but gradually they learn to wash, dress and feed themselves. Typically, a child will master daily self-care skills with relative ease. Many are self-motivated as is demonstrated by the words of a young child who wants to be like mom or dad, “I do myself.” Of course they can easily revert to “I can’t do,” within the next second.
Children with an Autism Spectrum Disorder often ‘can’t’ or ‘won’t’ take the initiative to become more independent in their self-care. ‘Can’t’ because they lack the necessary motor skills or ‘won’t’ due to sensory issues, inability to sequence or just don’t understand the social importance and why it is necessary.
Children on the Autism spectrum may need a few extra steps added to learn how to manage their physical self-care, such as prompting, modeling and specific teaching or training. Most kids with ASD do not learn basic hygiene skills through observation alone.
So how do you get your child to be independently responsible for his own self-care needs? You start early. I know it is often easier and less time consuming to do it ‘for her’ but think about the habits you are enforcing, the long-term dependence you are establishing and the social awkwardness you may be contributing to.
Let’s take hygiene for instance. No parent wants their child to be ridiculed or ostracized at school for an appearance or an odor that can be prevented. Children with ASD are already vulnerable enough to bullying as it is – there is no need to add fuel to the fire.
So what are you doing now to help your child learn how to care of her physical needs and appearance? If you have tried various things and you don’t feel like you are getting anywhere here are some strategies to consider.
- Determine where the struggle is. Identify and eliminate (or at least reduce) any possible roadblocks. Does your child lack the necessary motor skills to button a shirt, comb her hair or brush his teeth? Does the thought of touching a slippery, slime-y, wet bar of soap make washing hands an everyday battle? If so, seek out the help of an occupational therapist to address muscle weakness or sensory sensitivities.
- Break instruction down into small steps – one action at a time. Example: The goal is to wash face. Step 1 – Get towel. Step 2 – turn water on. Step 3 – wet face (with or without cloth). Step 4 – apply soap, and so on and so on. Depending on your child, you may even create more steps, such as finding the right water temperature when you turn it on. Practice each step until your child has mastered it, praising her very specifically for effort and/or accomplishment.
- Create a visual that labels each step. Many children cannot sequence a series of steps in their mind and fail to remember what comes next or they may have such a short attention spans that they loose their train of thought. Having a visual to refer to will help prompt them through the process and is handy for them to have when you are not able to be there. Remember to identify when the task needs to be done (time and place)– ex. after eating, before bed . . .. Writing a social story for each task that can be read repeatedly will help as well.
- Explain why good hygiene is necessary – never assume your child ‘gets it’. Find ways to help your child understand the social importance of being clean, smelling fresh and looking good. Create a vision board titled, When I Look and Smell My Best, Good Things Happen, cutting out pictures from magazines and using personal photos of what it means to have good hygiene and what the results are for doing so. Then hang in your child’s room as a constant reminder.
- Pay attention to the environment. Sometimes simply making your child’s bedroom and bathroom user-friendly and sensory-friendly can have a positive impact on his motivation to keep himself well groomed. Making clothing easily accessible, finding an unscented shampoo she really likes, having towels with just the right texture available, and even adding some music in the bathroom, or shower, can help.
As children approach puberty it becomes more and more important that they master a self-care routine. Reaching the pre-teen years presents more and more hygiene issues that need to be addressed such as shaving and menstruation. Remember, when teaching any child or young adult to care for their body it is always good to teach within the natural setting and, if possible, during a time when stress levels are low.
For more ideas or to discuss how to help your child learn good personal hygiene habits set up an appointment for a free 15-min chat by clicking here.
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